if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
