Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
