i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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