Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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