..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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