butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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