hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
