yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We're too hungover to prance.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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