turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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