i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
