just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
