lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
