Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize