i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
