i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
