Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
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