plz talk dirty to me
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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