Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
