Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
