Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I had to cum in my sink.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
