Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you more than these girls want KFC
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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