And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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