So drunk its hurt
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
another moral hangover. fuck.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.