my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
the raccoons are back...
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