omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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