i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
