so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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