Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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