ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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