Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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