I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Houston, we have a squirter
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
