My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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