How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
