Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
