what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
