on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
