Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
