If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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