No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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