dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
