The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
