She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
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I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
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I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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