that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
