so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
