Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize
