Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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