i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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