So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We need to rekindle our bromance
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Randomize
