marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
