yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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