thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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