I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
